Silent Slinky



Silent Slinky steals a motive from Arnold Schoenberg’s atonal hit song cycle from 1912, Pierrot Lunaire. It goes on with a corrupted version of "Silent Night," menacing snippets of "I’ll Be Home for Christmas," and the Slinky commercial jingle. It’s fun for a girl or a boy!

Wedding Day Funeral March


A chaotic marriage between Wagner’s Bridal Chorus and Chopin’s Funeral March. It includes a wistful version of “My Favorite Things,” and a ragtime/salsa section based on the "Dies Irae," a medieval chant for the Day of Wrath. 

Malicious Old Man


Chopin-esque basslines underneath “This Old Man,” and “Sing a Song of Sixpence.”  

Jolly Jesus


A bitonal campfire song. “Jesus Loves Me” and “Camptown Races” interspersed with “Lullaby and Good Night” in the style of Prokofiev. Recently, my friend Rich brought it to my attention that I had inadvertently quoted Ministry in this piece as well. 

Spindly Spider (with a small contribution from my cat near the end)


“Itsy Bitsy Spider” and “Three Blind Mice” with a sprinkle of “Rain, Rain, Go Away”

Sinister Sheep


“I am Slowly Going Crazy” and “Baa Baa Black Sheep”